ABOUT CONNOR

THE MAN WHO TRIED TO ESCAPE HIS SHADOW

I bought into the most dangerous rule of men: If you’re struggling, don’t talk about it.

I created an illusion of who I was supposed to be on the outside — the kind, funny, and charismatic guy with a great career and relationship. But on the other side of that facade hid my shadow — the destructive and manipulative version of myself who lied and cheated.

The idea of anyone finding out my truth felt like death.

And then it happened. Someone important to me cracked the illusion wide open, and I couldn’t lie my way out of it this time. To avoid crushing shame, I shut everyone out and ran. One night, while living in the back of my car, my reality hit me like a ton of bricks: I had chosen to completely isolate myself and hide, rather than take ownership of my darkness and face the people I had hurt.

It was then that I realized I only had two options: to continue to hide and silently suffer, or shine light into my deepest corners and start talking about it. It was in that darkest moment that I learned the greatest lesson:

The shadow lives within all of us. And facing it is the first step to awakening your greatest potential…

IT WAS IN THAT DARKEST MOMENT THAT I FOUND A MENTOR

Slowly opened up to a few people I trusted about what was going on. To my surprise, I found out that wasn’t alone.

I realized that the shadow was within everyone, everywhere.

The more I told my story, the more people started opening up about their own challenges. The more I spoke about my shadow, the more they revealed their own darkness. For once, we were given permission and space to share our struggles, shames, and desires around our careers, our relationships, our sexuality, our confidence, and our masculinity.

It made me question everything I thought I knew about being a man. How can we know everything about someone, except what makes them the most human?

I wanted to do something about this but I didn’t know where to start or how it would look like. Out of this, a mentor emerged — a pupil of Carl Jung. For two years I apprenticed with him, spending hours a day to study the concepts of Jungian psychology, Shadow Work, and the inner workings of the human psyche.

It was none of the rose-tinted fluff that shamed me for feeling like shit, or the self-help books that only pacified my discomfort. I went in deep, I slayed my demons, and I worked hard to come out the other side and take back control of my life.

MY PRESENT DAY WORK

After apprenticing with that pupil of Carl Jung, I developed an innovative approach to healing the Shadow – the part of our psyche that causes us to self-sabotage – by drawing from experiential and training-based methodologies like Jungian psychology, somatic therapy, along with transformative breathwork and meditative practices.

I’ve now been working for almost a decade as a NY-based coach, teacher, and speaker to help men (and women) from all over the world walk thought their darkness and grow in the realms of mental clarity, relational communication, actualizing their potential and sexual intimacy.

I have a no-BS attitude coupled with compassionate understanding of our own human limitations. I’ve coached hundreds of men (and women) though private coaching, group work, workshops, retreats and masterminds.

I have shared the stage with world class speakers like Gary Vaynerchuk, Lewis Howes, Danielle LaPorte, and many more.

In 2014, I founded ManTalks, a community for men looking to expand and deepen their sense of self-awareness. Today, I have expanded ManTalks to over a dozen cities, have a top ranked podcast, and am working on the launch of my first book.

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THE INITIATION PROCESS INTO MANHOOD THAT I NEVER PROPERLY WENT THROUGH

“Connor guided me through a process to accept, rediscover and love myself. In many ways, it felt like the initiation process into manhood that I never properly went through. I use the term “guided” because I never felt forced to think, act or do something in a specific way. Rather, I was confronted with possibilities and Connor left space for my brain and heart to do the rest. It is not easy work and that’s exactly the point. I am writing this while I’m still on this journey and the tools and guidance that Connor provided me with are helping me grow myself as a man in ways I didn’t know were possible before we started.”

- Brandon G

I HAVE MUCH MORE DIRECTION

Connor has a gift for asking questions that get to your core, and help you to recognize and uncover what it is that you really need. He pushes you and holds you accountable to make the positive changes, and decisions that need to be made to benefit your life. Through Connor’s mentorship and guidance, I have much more direction, changed careers (for the better), I found clarity in what I want in a relationship and I feel greater balance in all aspects of my life.

- Luke

UNDID OVER 30 YEARS OF DARKNESS AND BELIEFS

The time at the men’s weekend undid over 30 years of darkness and beliefs. I’m so grateful for the experience and how hard [he] pushed me to give 100% and leave the bullshit behind.

- Rob

HE CHALLENGES ME TO BE A BETTER MAN

I trust his genuine intentions, his caring nature, his methods and the ways that he challenges me to be a better man. I cannot say enough about the work Connor does, and would unequivocally recommend it to any man who has the courage to be a better man, husband, father, and professional.

- Ketan